The Pittsburgh Steelers emerge from their bye week with a 3-2 record with so many questions to be answered, and following their critical recent win against the Baltimore Ravens, Coach Mike Tomlin doesn’t feel required to answer any of them.
While the Steelers have had two weeks to ponder deep and profound inquiries such as “How did we manage to get three wins with this offense?” Steelers fans have used the extra time to sharpen pitchforks and to tune up their flaming torches with some more Canadian fire.
What is wrong with Steelers Nation? A whining nation. A continually booing from the stands nation.
This certainly must be baffling to the rest of league’s casual observers. Surely to those fans of teams who are already looking at next year’s NFL draft for help.
What do we make of all of this? Let’s give it a spin.
Please Stop The Charade
Perhaps the biggest comedy show in the National Football League is the weekly press conference with Coach Mike Tomlin.
He has no interest in what his fans think about his offensive coordinator nor any of his on-field decisions, game clock management strategies, personnel choices, or abstractions on the meaning of life.
News flash. Coach Tomlin doesn’t care what you think. He revels at ignoring your complaints.
Having him dance through the pretentions in front of the cameras on a weekly basis is both meaningless and insulting to all. It can’t be his favorite day of the week either.
And, at 3-2, he doesn’t need to care what fans think. If he keeps stacking up wins he knows that ignorance will continue to be bliss.
So…in the meantime, someone please take those press conferences behind the shed and put us all out of our misery.
Pressing On
Most likely Coach Mike Tomlin will be heading up the Steelers for as long as he wants to, but this hasn’t stopped people from speculating what he’ll do next after he eventually hangs up his coaching spurs.
Most believe he’ll step directly into an NFL talking heads broadcast studio and become one of the best (and most articulate) pundits the league and television has ever enjoyed.
However, I believe there is a career move that will even more optimize his skill set. Wouldn’t he make a fabulous Press Secretary in the White House? Here’s how I see it playing out:
REPORTER: Press Secretary Tomlin. As you are aware, the President claimed he forgot he was supposed to pardon one of the two Thanksgiving turkeys and instead accidentally ordered them both to get the axe. What is your response in defending this move by the President?
TOMLIN: Look…I celebrate the leadership qualities of this president in being able to inspire those two young birds to give one hundred percent of their thinking ability for the team. We ask of all our players and citizens that they be ready to step in whenever they need to answer the call. The President didn’t hesitate when he saw that first turkey go down to say, “Next turkey up”. How can we not applaud that level of decisiveness?
REPORTER: I understand Mr. Secretary, but what do you say to all the kids who were at the White House to see the turkey that got pardoned, only to have their day end with such a difficult loss?
TOMLIN: We are not immune to the difficulty of the situation we put ourselves in. But will all due respect, you’re just not seeing it how we do within the White House, with all our experience, knowledge, good looks, bank accounts, and insider information. You’re seeing this from your perspective as being fat and sassy, and I appreciate that. You think we lost two turkeys. We don’t see it that way and we embrace the possibilities differently in this locker room. We see it as now there will be four turkey legs instead of just two for Thanksgiving dinner. Less fighting at the dinner table. Those children will experience that joy and we have our President to thank for this.
REPORTER: I’m confused. You sound pleased with the President’s performance in ruining this nation’s treasured Holiday tradition.
TOMLIN: There is no joy in what happened to those turkeys. But from our position we simply need to block out the noise. The noise being the people of this United States. We are not ignorant to the idea that the people have a voice. We just choose to term that voice for what it is. Noise. Every day we will block that out as we are so apt to do. Any more questions? Thank you.
There’s A Draft In Here
On the bright side, and there always are bright sides on the sunny side of life, we should be continuing to give standing ovations for General Manager Omar Khan and Tomlin for this year’s 2023 NFL Draft class. We thought this was going to end up being a generationally good draft and the young men selected this year are proving this to be true.
With the early season injury to Cameron Heyward, second round draft pick Keeanu Benton has been thrown right into the defensive line rotation fire and he’s responded in a big way.
Last game again the Ravens, the other second rounder Joey Porter, Jr. AK Peezy Jr. literally saved the Steelers bacon with an impressive game preserving interception in the end zone. This hasn’t been the only time he’s shown he’s capable of being able to cover the league’s best players, at least with some safety cover in place.
Then there is first rounder Broderick Jones, who played a full sixty last game in lieu of injured and much maligned left tackle Dan Moore.
Now…I must say, I thought Jones was rookie rock solid from the first preseason snap he took for the Steelers this year. Was he perfect? No. But, it remains strange to hear about all of this “mystery development” that he still requires while Moore continues to show what we already knew coming into this year.
Oh…did we forget about fourth round selection Darnell Washington, the mammoth tight end for the Steelers? He too has stepped in for a Steelers starter that got injured in Pat Freiermuth and has done exceptionally well.
He’s actually the most enjoyable lineman on the team to watch block. He serves up more pancakes than IHOP on Sundays.
If I’ve got a complaint, and of course I do and it’s a big one, it’s that somehow the Steelers have forgotten that tight ends are able to catch passes. He proved he was an exceptional receiver in college. Why hasn’t his unique abilities been designed into this offense? My understanding is that they’ve known he’s been on the team since April.
New Business Cards
One of the year’s biggest disappointments in terms of the Steelers defense has been in the team’s ability (or disability) to stop (or at least slow down) their opponents’ top receivers. Don’t ask Tomlin why. No really. Don’t ask him.
Most Steelers fans are making chief villains of the team’s cornerbacks in explaining poor pass defense and are anxious to trot Joey Porter, Jr. on the field on his horse to save the day.
I don’t share the mounting discontent about Patrick Peterson, who not too long ago was considered to be one of the best cornerbacks and defensive players in the NFL. He’s certainly experienced some notable field burn, but he’s at least been competitive.
The greatest issue has been on the other side of the field. The problem is the Steelers have printed the wrong job title on the business cards of Levi Wallace.
Somehow they’ve perceived him to be a shutdown corner able to erase the aspirations of top opposing receivers and have designed their entire defense around this mistruth.
I would suggest it’s time to get some new business cards for Wallace with the new title of “Detective”.
Why you ask?
Because every time opposing teams have a big passing play it seems as if Wallace is right there at the scene of the crime.
Bubble Wrap
The only logical reason why the Steelers haven’t gone ahead and provided outstanding rookie Broderick Jones on-the-job training this season is they are cleverly using Dan Moore’s ego as a battering ram.
This season has been unprecedented in terms of the level of pass rushers the Steelers have had to face already this early in the season. Look at this Murderers Row they’ve been up against.
Nick Bosa (San Francisco 49ers)
Myles Garrett (Cleveland Browns)
Maxx Crosby (Las Vegas Raiders)
The Baltimore Ravens are currently boasting the league’s top pass rushing unit so far this season with their Justin Madubuike leading their charge with 4.5 sacks this year.
This week? No rest for the weary as Pittsburgh face hometown favorite and All -world Aaron Donald, a perennial defensive player of the year candidate.
Are they packing their young rookie’s confidence in bubble wrap by keeping him on the bench? Just trying to make some sense out of the non-sensical.
Are The Steelers Ram Tough
Every game seems to be a critical test for the Steelers of “Are They…or…Aren’t They?” As in, are these Steelers any good?
This week is no different as Pittsburgh takes on a Rams squad that is doing surprisingly well this season, better than their 3-3 record would suggest.
Their quarterback Matt Stafford is showing how good he can still be when healthy, their running game is formidable and with Cooper Kupp back on the field pairing up with rookie sensation Puka Nacua they can catch the ball with any team in the league.
The Steelers do have an impressive card up their sleeve with the return of Diontae Johnson from the injured reserve. Johnson’s hamstring injury at the beginning of the season has had a bigger impact on the offense than is discussed and his ability to get open…regardless of the play calling…is something that has been sorely missed.
Expect there to be plenty of West Coast Steelers faithful at yet another enemy stadium in Los Angeles. This will be a highly watchable matchup.
The Steelers are coming off their Bye Week with a chance to be 4-2 in what looks to be the toughest division in the NFL. Are the Steelers Ram Tough?
Time to find out.
